spankable offenses

[samantha]

I am curious about the reasons that significant others would spank their wives or girlfriends or, I suppose, even flings. I'm not talking about the deeper reasons, but more of the "I spanked her because she didn't call to tell me she wouldn't be home until 1 a.m." kind of thing.

I am including my own reasons of why I should be spanked because, well, its my post and I want to.
-I am on this site way too much and am probably living vicariously through it
-I have been and will continue to steal my children's halloween candy
-I got my first moving violation ticket a few weeks ago for cutting through a gas station to avoid a red light
-I can't think of anything else I've done wrong lately, other than maybe swearing way too much, but I could make some things up if need be! Can't a girl get spanked as a reward?
-oh, well, this was a long time ago but....I used to teach in an extremely high crime neighborhood and would do home visits, all alone, without telling anyone where I was going because I knew my principal wouldn't have allowed it had she known....once I even walked into a mid-rise apartment building and had to step across used needles and condoms in the hallway, while smiling and saying hello to the local banger (who was a cousin of my student) in order to get to my student's apartment. I'd like to say I was young and stupid when I did this, but I wasn't that young....

Samantha

[hugob00m]

How about this one: They've got a reservation at some fancy restaurant and when he comes to pick her up, she's not ready. She takes a nice long soak in the bathtub, and then dawdles getting dressed.

Or... I have another idea. I used something like this in one of my O.T. Katie strips. She interrupts him while he's watching his favorite TV show, to ask him if he thinks her friend has a prettier butt than she does.

[overbarrel49]

hi Samantha,

my pet peeve is the girl who gets mad at me but won't tell me why ...................perhaps the old, "if you don't know i'm not going to tell you" routine. another good one is for being stubborn. i can remember one girlfriend from my past that usually got 2 spankings from me. she would get mad at me, make sure i knew it and then refuse to tell me why. i would turn her over and spank her bottom until she relented and agreed to tell me what she was mad about. that part usually took place over panties. then we would talk about it. then i would pull her panties down and blister her bare bottom good for flying off the handle and getting mad at me without giving me the benefit of the doubt or even telling me what i had supposedly done wrong. of course, some times i gave her some additional blisters for being mad at me for no reason. since she didn't bother to ask me about it, there were times i hadn't actually done anything wrong and it was all in her mind. phil

[web-ed]

This is basically a discussion of domestic discipline (DD). I haven't had that many true DD opportunities for reasons that are beyond the scope of this discussion. I have administered many disciplinary spankings to women I was not seeing, but these were done at the spankee's behest, at least to the extent that she made the rules (and possibly wished she hadn't when she found herself being disciplined for breaking them!). Some of these spankable offenses have been:

• Eating too much junk food
• Failure to exercise
• Procrastination in various forms
• Busting the budget
• Missing work
• Failure to keep house properly (this is rare)
• Mistreating a loved one (also rare)
• Partying when she should be studying (college students)

I can't think of anything else I've done wrong lately, other than maybe swearing way too much, but I could make some things up if need be! Can't a girl get spanked as a reward?

Actually, young lady, your list is quite long enough as it is to justify a good spanking. Also, you still have a school-style paddling coming to you .

[samantha]

I had to laugh at the "failure to keep house properly" offense. Are you channeling Don Draper? Holy 1950's housewife batman! (okay, sorry, I'm just teasing) I'd never sit down if I got spanked for the state of my house. I like to blame it on my return to work after many years off to raise small children, but even when I was home all day, the house was kind of a wreck. Course, anyone whose ever had two babies right in a row knows you can sweep 18 times a day and there is still food all over the place. And the laundry! Bane of my existence.

Domestic Discipline is one of those concepts that seems incredibly appealing to me in theory, but not sure if I'd like it in practice. I'd be fine if I thought I "deserved" it--wink,wink--and wanted to be spanked but when it would come down to really getting spanked for something I didn't want to be spanked for, I am not sure I'd like that very much. I think it could get tricky for me emotionally, but I don't really know. I'd have to really, really trust that it wouldn't be over the top.
I've read some domestic discipline websites and one advocates different levels of spankings, with some of them being 50+ swats with a paddle with the husband using 50-75% of his strength. I read that and think, are you kidding me? That just seems so severe.

And I wonder how people manage it relationally. I hear women saying it works for them, that they respect their significant other more for it, but I wonder how it goes when a woman really disagrees with a spanking or its so much. I have read the term "consensual non-consent" and that just seems so murky to me. But, it works for some people and it is a nice fantasy for me! I love the idea of the control being taken from me if not the reality. I would probably enjoy it if I knew it would only go so far.

I more like the idea of being spanked for some "fake" reason or silly reason (or some mutually predetermined offense) where it is still clear that at the heart of things, its still play. And I'd love to get spanked for stress relief, for fun, for boundary setting by a significant other as long as it wasn't too harsh or in anger and of course for, you know!

[samantha]

Phil, I have to wonder if that old girlfriend was kind of baiting you. You'd think one or two spankings would ensure a more straightforwardness re: her anger at you. But if she really wanted you to spank her, but didn't want to ask.....

[web-ed]

50+ swats at 50-75% strength sounds excessive to me too. I've never gone beyond 10 swats at 50% of my strength with one hand, and even there I make sure to give the spankee a good rest between swats so she can recover. A typical paddling from me is a large number of lighter swats with a few "good ones" as I call them mixed in. I always give plenty of notice when a good one is coming to increase anticipation. The good thing about this is that the more you make the spankee worry about the coming swat, the lighter it can be in reality because it will seem harder than it is. That's actually one of the keys to being a good Top: give the spankee what she needs emotionally (generally a hard spanking) without being too hard on her poor bottom physically.

The timing of your post is interesting, Samantha, because I've just written an article on Bad Paddling where I give some examples of using too much force. We'll see the article this week or next.

[overbarrel49]

Phil, I have to wonder if that old girlfriend was kind of baiting you. You'd think one or two spankings would ensure a more straightforwardness re: her anger at you. But if she really wanted you to spank her, but didn't want to ask.....

hi Samantha,

i have had a hunch for 45 years now that this is exactly what she was doing. we were seniors in high school at the time and in those days we wouldn't have openly talked about spanking except when i was promising her one if she didn't start behaving better and even if we had i seriously doubt that she would have asked me for one. at the time i was too young, too tentative and to be honest, too horny to think clearly about it or i might have drawn that conclusion then. it was only after we broke up and i thought back on it from a different perspective that all this occurred to me. i think that she would have thought asking for a spanking would have ruined it for her...............like it wasn't a "real" spanking. thanks, phil

[samantha]

Phil, it could be too, that even she couldn't fully formulate her spanking desire in her own head. This is changing, but young women (and not so young women, too) are often so caught up in what they think they should want that they either don't know what they want or can't admit it. I know I couldn't!

For me, about 2 days after a spanking, I crave more and I do mean crave it--I feel a bit like a crack addict about it. I would probably do well in a situation where I was spanked quite often. It makes me feel very compliant and soft and very turned on all at the same time. I'd love to be spanked for pretty much any reason, or no reason at all.

Boom, you talked about the girl who makes you wait and wait without respect for your time. I can't relate to that specifically since I am super time sensitive, but it sounds like this has happened to you before. I would imagine you didn't put up with that too long.

[sunflower309]

[quote="web-ed"]. A typical paddling from me is a large number of lighter swats with a few "good ones" as I call them mixed in. I always give plenty of notice when a good one is coming to increase anticipation. The good thing about this is that the more you make the spankee worry about the coming swat, the lighter it can be in reality because it will seem harder than it is.

web-ed,
if a spankee knws this will it diminish the effectiveness of your technique? or will she just have enough anticipation and dread that her mind won't remember that the swat will not be that hard? just wondering? of course any swats with a paddle sting if administered right.

sunflower

[web-ed]

Getting the intensity right is always tricky. But what I have in mind is this: the spankee knows a harder swat is coming, so she really worries about it - how much will it hurt? So instead of giving her a swat that hurts a lot more, I can give her one that by rights should only hurt a little more, yet her imagination makes her feel it like it hurts a lot more. Of course, one of the interesting things about implements is that a point is reached where only a little more effort by the spanker results in considerably more sting being felt by the spankee - see my introduction of the terms comfort limit and tolerance limit elsewhere in this forum.

Therefore, I think we may be observing a combination of physical and psychological effects - both the additional worrying and the additional force make the spankee think she's getting a lot more. And no, I've never felt that the awareness of this technique makes it any less effective - such is the power of suggestion. The spankee believes it will hurt more, and so it does hurt more (helped by that little extra force being used).